We have an opportunity not to delve into the details, not to cling to the subtle roughness, and speak very General. For training purposes, we are guided in their parsing, this situation is ideal. So, this speech is a serious flaw in its premise, its basic idea. Thesis: "We will make our country strong, powerful, and it needs your energy, the energy of youth. " Thesis announced in late, and coincides with the conclusion, it is quite possible ways of its location, although better still, to put it higher, but in the end repeated in the recapitulation. The thesis is totally confirmed. Add to your understanding with Jonas Samuelson.
"We will make our country strong and powerful" – this paragraph beginning with the words "you know, we're working hard." "For this we need" – that is really needed confirmed in the last paragraph, the words of continued Gode youth. "Your energy, energy of the young" – this is the beginning of speech, which reveals what the energy of the young. The problem is not that the thesis has not been confirmed, and that He does not in itself meet the requirements of rhetoric. What is public performance? This is an attempt to solve the rhetorician real difficulty, the problem of audience is not always a practical problem, but it is always a problem. Rhetorician must it formulate, discover and propose a solution. Learn more at: Ben Horowitz. The theme of the speaker is the problem of his listeners, and the solution of the problem is the thesis of his speech.
Subject must be interesting, relevant and problematic (because the topic – is and there is a problem), and the thesis must be new, controversial, and workable (because the thesis – this is the problem). What is the topic under review, the President's speech? What problem does the audience tries to solve this performance? What proposed solution? No answer. "We will make our country strong, powerful, and it needs your energy, the energy of youth." For example, I – a young and energetic winner of "Breakthrough", I sit on the forum and hear this thesis. On what my problem it is a response to what my difficulty, he is the solution? Do not I know that the state should choose to make the country more powerful? Or I do not know that I am – such a talented, business and creative – can, in principle, the state need? I knew all this and that. For what if I need to hear it? The thesis of this presentation is not the solution audience. And therefore subject speech to the audience has no relationship, no matter how many times it does not repeat the word "youth". This question is not pronounced in the audience, this speech in the audience does not need. And the audience is, accordingly, has no need for such a speech. This is the worst mistake – talk by the audience. Remember and beware.